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Ryan is a 17 year old high school senior. He comes from a middle class neighborhood in the midwest. He is a good student getting mostly B’s, but hasn’t ever really liked school. His parents are both college graduates, and there hasn’t ever been any doubt that Ryan would be attending college, hopefully at mom or dad’s alma mater. Ryan’s parents are reasonably affluent, and are able to pay for Ryan’s education. They have been saving for it since he was a baby.

Jessica is also a 17 year high school senior. She comes from a lower economic class than Ryan, and lives in an urban community in the northeast. She is an excellent student and get’s pretty much straight A’s. She loves school. Her parents never went to college, but hope she can get into a state school, paid for with scholarships and student loans. Her parents have visions of their baby girl becoming a Supreme Court Justice, and have been talking about her becoming a lawyer for as long as she can remember.

Ryan has many interests. He is a good athlete, and loves to work with his hands. He has excelled in pretty much any trade he has ever tried. He also has a God given talent for fixing things. His family and friends have always been amazed at how he can take something apart, find the problem, repair it, and put it back together as if he had the manual memorized in his head. Ryan is that guy you call when your car won’t start, your dishwasher won’t drain, or your garage door won’t open. He just knows what to do.

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Jessica loves children. She has always had a special affinity for developmentally challenged kids, and has worked at a summer camp for Autistic children for the past three summers. A few years back, she started babysitting for a family with an Autistic child and “fell in love with him” as she put it. She hasn’t ever felt as fulfilled in her 17 years as she does when she is working with “her kids”. She hopes to be able to work in some career that will help her use her love for helping these very special children.

“Ryan, did you see that application to Purdue I left in your room? You need to get that filled out or go on line and apply or you won’t get accepted. You’ll love Purdue!!” his Dad said.

“Oh no you don’t Zach. I already left him a package of information on Indiana University. You saw that Ryan honey, didn’t you?” his mom Kathy countered.

Ryan just ignored them. He’d spent the day thinking that he just can’t imagine himself at either school. He knows that his parents have high expectations for him, and he hasn’t ever done anything to intentionally disappoint them, but college is not in his plans. He has no intention of applying to either university. “How am I ever going to be able to tell them that?” he wondered.

Jessica got home from school and was getting ready to go babysit Josh. Josh is ten years old and has Autism. Seeing Josh is the highlight of her day. She loves to watch his face light up when he sees her walk down the street towards his apartment. Josh’s mother leaves for work at 4:00 and Jessica stays with him until his father comes home from work around 6:30. It is a labor of love to say the least.

“Jessie, why do you spend so much time watching that boy? You don’t even get paid for all the time you spend with him. Shouldn’t you be working on those college entrance and scholarship essays? Four years of college and law school is very expensive.” her mother asked.

“I am working on them mom, but you know how much I love taking care of Josh” she answered. She knew that she wasn’t telling the entire truth. She was working on her essays, but not for pre-law, but for admittance to the Special Education teachers program at a university in New Jersey. “How am I ever going to be able to tell them that?” she wondered.

Jessica and Ryan are like millions of people across the world that go into fields and careers in which they have no interest. I will continue this series to show you how to choose your career, write your resume, go on your interview, and completely manage your entire career no matter what stage you are in.

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I had a boss some years ago that was something less than a friendly guy. I wrote about him in an earlier post called “My boss is nuts”.

This guy would storm around the office with this scowl on his face all day. If you saw him coming down the hall, you would do what you could to avoid him, but more importantly, if he passed by you, he would ignore you after you spoke to him. Now, I was a vice president at the time. I’ve never been ignored by my boss, so of course I let my imagination run wild with why he did that. I decided he just didn’t like me.

One day, after he passed me and ignored me after my saying “good morning”, I called back to him “Boss? Can I talk to you?” He stopped dead in his tracks and whirled around glaring at me. We walked to his office where I said “Why don’t you answer me when I say good morning? Do we have a problem?” With that, he looked at me and said coldly “I didn’t hear you. I would never do that on purpose.”

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I went on to tell him he did it all the time. He explained that he was often deep in thought and just didn’t notice people. I told him I understood, but that his actions set the tone for the office. He took my comments in stride, tried to improve, but made little progress. But, I learned something from that experience.

I learned that my words and my demeanor affect the demeanor of my staff. If I take a second in the morning to say hello, they feel more comfortable. If I “check” the tone of my voice, they don’t infer something that isn’t there. And, if I don’t call after them as they are walking in the door and let them get their coat off and get a cup of coffee, they are much more productive all day long and, feel respected.

I suggest as managers, future managers and co-workers, we pay attention to the message we send out as we go through our days. People will respond to your demeanor, so if you saying “I am not happy” with your body language, they will pick it up and emulate it.

Hope this helps!!

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The 6 Most Annoying Coworkers: Are You One?

By Doug White, Robert Half International, Yahoo! HotJobs

Nearly every workplace has them: the Naysayer, who dismisses team members’ ideas; the Spotlight Stealer, who claims credit for a colleague’s efforts; and other annoying coworkers who make collaboration difficult. Following are six professionals whose irritating behaviors and irksome attitudes prevent them from forming productive relationships at work — and what you should to do avoid following in their footsteps:

1. The Naysayer. This office dweller delights in shooting down ideas. Even during “blue sky” brainstorming sessions, where all suggestions are to be contemplated with an open mind, the Naysayer immediately pooh-poohs any proposal that challenges the status quo.

The right approach: Because great solutions often rise from diverse opinions, withhold comment — and judgment — until the appropriate time. Moreover, be tactful and constructive when delivering criticism or alternative viewpoints.

2. The Spotlight Stealer. There is definitely an “I” in “team” according to this glory seeker, who tries to take full credit for collaborative efforts and impress higher-ups. This overly ambitious corporate climber never heard a good idea he wouldn’t pass off as his own.

The right approach: Win over the boss and colleagues by being a team player. When receiving kudos, for instance, publicly thank everyone who helped you. “I couldn’t have done it without …” is a savvy phrase to remember.

3. The Buzzwordsmith. Whether speaking or writing, the Buzzwordsmith sacrifices clarity in favor of showcasing an expansive vocabulary of cliched business terms. This ineffective communicator loves to “utilize” — never just “use” — industry-specific jargon and obscure acronyms that muddle messages. Favorite buzzwords include “synergistic,” “actionable,” “monetize,” and “paradigm shift.”

The right approach: Be succinct. Focus on clarity and minimize misunderstandings by favoring direct, concrete statements. If you’re unsure whether the person you are communicating with will understand your message, rephrase it, using “plain English.”

4. The Inconsiderate Emailer. Addicted to the “reply all” function, this “cc” supporter clogs colleagues’ already-overflowing inboxes with unnecessary messages. This person also marks less-than-critical emails as “high priority” and sends enormous attachments that crash unwitting recipients’ computers.

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The right approach: Break the habit of using email as your default mode of communication, as many conversations are better suited for quick phone calls or in-person discussions. The benefit? The less email you send, the less you’re likely to receive.

5. The Interrupter. The Interrupter has little regard for others’ peace, quiet or concentration. When this person is not entering your work area to request immediate help, the Interrupter is in meetings loudly tapping on a laptop, fielding calls on a cell phone, or initiating off-topic side conversations.

The right approach: Don’t let competing demands and tight deadlines trump basic common courtesy. Simply put, mind your manners to build healthy relationships at work.

6. The Stick in the Mud. This person is all business all of the time. Disapproving of any attempt at levity, the constant killjoy doesn’t have fun at work and doesn’t think anyone else should either.

The right approach: Have a sense of humor and don’t be afraid to laugh at yourself once in awhile. A good laugh can help you build rapport, boost morale, and deflate tension when working under stressful situations.

It’s fairly easy to spot the qualities that make the above individuals irritating — at least when the behaviors are displayed by others. It can be a challenge to recognize when you exhibit them yourself. You may not realize, for instance, that you always pepper your communications with industry- or company-specific jargon, even when speaking with new employees or outside contacts. Though you may not be a full-fledged Interrupter or Stick in the Mud, take care to avoid heading down their paths.

The best advice: Remember common courtesy and act toward others as you want them to act toward you.

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I am a big fan of the 2006 superbowl champion Indianapolis Colts football team. The year the Colts won the superbowl, they were having serious problems with their defense. They were actually last in the NFL in the beginning of the season. The press and the fans were getting very upset that Coach Tony Dungy didn’t appear to have an answer. The press minimally wanted to see the defensive coordinator fired, and to see wholesale changes in the defensive roster.

As the season progressed, the defense didn’t improve and the cries got louder. Then, Coach Dungy made two changes to the defense. Yes, he made only two changes on a team of 11 defensive players. One change was the return of an injured player, and the second was the return of a veteran player who lost his starting job to a younger player. Those two apparently small changes improved the defense so dramatically that the team began to play better almost immediately. All of the statistics used to measure a defense improved as well. Those two changes, not wholesale knee jerk reactions, improved the team without destroying the team altogether.

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That lesson is one that needs to be taught and understood by all levels of management from first level supervisors to CEO’s. Sometimes the need to demonstrate some action, any action causes managers to do things that have no positive affect on the problem. I have seen new senior managers come into their new company and fire incumbent executives in an effort to demonstrate change. I too have seen CEO’s lay off large numbers of headcount just to demonstrate to the board that they are taking action in a down economy. I am sure you all have seen this behavior.

The bottom line is that sometimes the answer is to do nothing, or very little at all. Observing and determining what the true problem actually is can take time. The best managers will allow themselves that time before making wholesale changes. The worst ones will just do something….anything to show they are in charge.

Ridiculous.

The next time you are faced with solving a problem, take a second to ask yourself “What would Tony do?” The answer might just be to make two small changes, or maybe none at all.

Hope this helps!!

Email your questions to mike@directyourcareer.com.

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Every so often, one of my clients will get a little lazy and tell me they don’t need a cover letter. They tell me their resume is just fine without and besides “no one reads them anyway”.

“Not true” I tell them. Cover Letters are very important. They are the salad before the main course. They are the stretching exercises before the race. They are the opening act for the headlining band (I dare not say which headliner, lest I alienate some segment of my readership)!! They are the….uh, the…, uh, well, I guess I’ve run out of comparisons. They’re just important, dang it. And here is why.

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Your resume, if written correctly is a chronological record of your work history. It contains certain highlights of your career, and documents your education, training, and special accomplishments. It is your opportunity tell someone about yourself in the most concise method available.

Your cover letter on the other hand is on a more personal level. It is often addressed to an individual and gives you an opportunity to specifically address your qualities or attributes that are called out in the ad itself. If the ad calls for leadership qualities, the cover letter is where you can talk about it. If the ad uses certain key phrases or industry jargon, the cover letter is your place to show off a little.

Yes, the cover letter is your personal introduction and is intended to spark enough interest in the reader that he or she wants to go to the main course.
Hope this helps!!

Email your questions to mike@directyourcareer.com

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History is full of famous failures - people who tried and tried, but had a long history of few accomplishments before finally finding their true calling. I too have had more failures than I would like to admit. I have had problems with alcohol, relationships, and work that have threatened to keep me down, or even more seriously, nearly killed me. Each time, I decided that I wouldn’t stay down and got up and tried again.

There is a good chance that you have or will have career set backs. I hope you don’t, but my experience has been that you will. But, the good news is that set-backs are only temporary and the game isn’t over until you are looking at the grass from the dirt side up.

If you want to get a sense of reality, visit a hospital. You will find yourself more grateful upon your leaving than when you entered.

Take a look at this video and let know what you think. Don’t worry, it will leave you feeling very good - not bad. I won’t ever do that to you!!

Mike

Several years ago, I was having a discussion with one of my staff. The conversation went all over the place, but he finally blurted out “You know, I just can’t figure out why I don’t get promoted. I know as much as anyone. How did you do it?”

The conversation surprised me a little bit, because this employee, but his appearance alone never gave me and I’m sure anyone else the impression that he wanted to be part of management. What I mean is that this gentleman was in his later 30’s, but looked like a throw back to 1965. He has long, unstyled hair that he pulled back into a pony tail. He had a very bushy mustache. He only shaved every two or three days, and had a perpetual five o’clock shadow. And lastly, he wore tee shirts, faded jeans, and sneakers, boat shoes actually, that were well broken in.

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The irony is that this man was very smart and very talented at his profession. The problem is that his outward appearance shouted “I don’t care. I am a non-conformist.” I know, I know….good for him! Stick it to the man!! We need more non-conformists!!! Well, maybe. But, the conformists still run everything.

Back to my friend. I decided I would try to break the news to him gently. I told him that when I was younger, I loved to wear jeans and tennis shoes to work. I told him that I loved the comfort of wearing jeans, until a big boss once said “Mike, we are having a meeting with a customer tomorrow, can you break out some dress pants.” I told him I realized I was the only one he said that to in a group of 5 of us that were meeting with the customer. I was a little embarrassed, but took it as subtle advice.

I told him that from that point on, I started wearing business casual clothes. I decided that I could wear dockers and a nice shirt. I could wear comfortable leather shoes that looked nice. I wore matching belts, etc. I told him I wanted to succeed and get promoted, so I dressed like the people who had the jobs I wanted. I added that it took me a little while to buy all the clothes I needed, but after a few months, I had 5 or 6 nice shirts and 3 pair or pants that I could mix and match.

My friend looked at me and said much to my amazement “Wow, that is way too much work.” He left my office and went whistling back to work. I just smiled.

The point is obvious. If you choose to dress down or differently from your co-workers or the people who have the jobs you want, then you will be “classified”. You need to dress for the position you want, and the sooner you do, the sooner you will be noticed.

Hope this helps!!

Email your questions to mike@directyourcareer.com

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As a career coach and parent, I have many times heard people say:

“I just don’t know what I want to do with my life. I can’t figure out what I want to be.”

And, that comment didn’t just come from younger people entering the work force, but many middle and senior managers who’d been considering making a career change. To be honest, that question used to puzzle me, because I didn’t have a great answer for it. I’d ask myself “how do advise someone on what they should do for the rest of their lives?”

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Well, I came to the conclusion that I can’t really advise them on what they should do for the rest of their lives, but I could advise them on how to evaluate their options.

Whenever that question is posed to me, I answer it with a question. If asked “how do I figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life?” I ask in return:

“What two or three things do you love doing so much, that you would do it absolutely for free? What area of your life makes you so happy, that it isn’t work?”

Most people can think of at least one thing right off the bat, which they immediately discard because they don’t believe they can make money at it, or aren’t good enough to do it professionally. Maybe that is true, but the second question I ask is:

“Ok, now that you know what those things are, what professions, or what industries exist in that field that you could make a living?” That then becomes the hook that gets them thinking about the job of their dreams.

For example, lets say you absolutely love music. You listen to it. You buy it. You read about and just know a great deal about it, but you are tone deaf. Can’t sing a note. Well, what jobs are there in support of the music industry that would just make you happy to be around it? If are just starting out, maybe working in a music store is your start. You will meet musicians or like minded people and find yourself managing a band, or managing bookings for a club.

If you are an accountant working in a hospital and love music, you may look for work in the record industry, etc. You can still use your accounting skills, but in an industry you love.

Do you love clothes? Do you love to shop? Are the woman in the office from whom everyone fashion advice? Well then, what jobs exist (other than Vera Wang’s job) can you do that is in the fashion industry? There are dozens!!!

The point is obvious. We have hobbies. We all have talents. We all have to eat!!! Wherever you are in your career, make a decision to find work in doing something you love and you will never work a day in your life.

And parents, do not push your kids into being doctors, accountants and engineers because you think it would be a great career for them. Encourage them to do something in a field that they love.

Hope this helps!!!

Mike Edwards

Email me at mike@directyourcareer.com and read my blog at http://www.directyoucareer.com

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A Huge Career Success Component

You can’t get or keep your career on track if your home life is unhappy and distracting you; it can shake your self-esteem to the bone and make you hesitate when opportunity knocks. Learn from relationship and marriage counselor, personal coach and my friend David Cunningham how to set things right and enjoy doing so at
www.makingherhappy.com and check out his blog at blog.makingherhappy.com.

And don’t forget to sign-up for his free newsletter.